Do not be a d–k
I’ve been thinking about this since last Saturday night, when I saw a terrific movie at the Sundance Film Festival that I won’t name, for reasons about to become clear. I’ve been trying to sort through how I feel about what happened, and I decided to just throw it out to you guys.
The flick was excellent, as I said. It was made by a guy who has already had a successful movie before this one. And the movie was so good I was all excited to hear what he had to say in the Q & A afterward.
And it wasn’t long before my husband leaned over to me and whispered, “This guy is a d–k. (As I’ve said before, this blog is read by infants and grandmas, so you’ll have to fill in the missing letters yourself.)
D–k he was. Smug. Arrogant. Annoyed by all of our questions, which he made sure we all knew were stupid by the way he’d pause and huff and roll his eyes.
This was in one of the huge auditoriums, and so it’s intimidating enough to stand up and ask a question without the director then acting like you’re a total buffoon.
And as the Q & A progressed, I not only liked the guy less and less, but I sort of started to feel that way about his movie. Which is a terrible thing, because standing on its own it’s completely worthy of huge and repeat audiences.
Contrast that with the Q & A after Black Snake Moan, during which writer and director Craig Brewer was charming and humble and grateful enough to take a moment to thank everyone for supporting Hustle & Flow when it appeared at Sundance two years ago (and won the audience award), which then made it possible for him to have the happy career he’s having right now.
I’ll see whatever he makes from now on. Because he makes great movies and he’s a nice guy. That’s what I want in my celebrities.
I’ve had the same experience with writers I’ve heard speak over the years. If someone is funny and kind and patient with all those new writers out in the audience so hungry for advice, then I’ll go read that person’s work, even if it’s not something I would have picked up otherwise. It’s also why I buy hardback novels by writers I like–I don’t resent the extra cost of not waiting for the paperback because I actually want to support their careers. It’s also why I read books by writers whose blogs I enjoy. As the flight attendants say, “We know you have a choice when flying, and we appreciate you flying with us.” I have lots of choices about which books to read and movies to see, and I like to reward people who make that extra effort to entertain and enlighten me and to treat their fans well.
And I do not want to reward the d–ks.
Any of you have an experience like this? Are you as partisan as I am, or do you try to ignore what someone is like in real life, and just appreciate their work as something separate?
Technorati Tags: Movies, Films, Sundance Film Festival, Directors, Craig Brewer, Black Snake Moan, Hustle & Flow, Writing, Publishing, Writers, Authors
February 1st, 2007 at 10:09 am
I just cannot give my business to a d-k whether they are a writer, movie person, or just the drycleaner. A d-k is a d-k and life’s too short to waste time on them when there are so many other talented nice people out there. Others have said to me i’m cheating myself out of good entertainment or services just because I don’t like the writer/actor/drycleaner etc. I don’t care, my perception of the quality of those services/products is colored by my feelings about them being a d-k.
I used to love Woody Allen books/movies and then he had that marrying his stepdaughter thing going on and his stuff doesn’t seem all that funny to me anymore. But when I was a young intern I had Olivier Sacks consult on a case mine and he was amazing-patient, caring, just plain nice with me a lowly, no-nothing intern. I had never read much of his work before, but after that I went and bought all his books and continue to do so. So there you go-you get back what you put out there!
February 1st, 2007 at 10:28 am
I completely agree with you about Woody Allen. I can’t stand to hear him or watch him anymore. Ick.
I’m also done with Tom Cruise. Too weird.
February 1st, 2007 at 10:58 am
I agree with you. Tom Clancy’s work I would jump on as soon as it came out. The last book I read of his it was clear he was a sinophobic racist. I then heard him speak on television which just confirmed my impression. I have not spent another penny on his work.
I’ve enjoyed Mel Gibson’s work up to “The Passion of Christ”. I will not support his work anymore.
Just because an artist starts enjoying success does not mean they should start believing their press.
I do not have to like an artist to experience their work. But, I will not support someone who starts thinking their sh…t does not stink or uses the forum provided to them because of their art to spread evil.
February 1st, 2007 at 11:54 am
Some people think I’m strange, but I like to spread evil on low salt wheat thins. I understand this isn’t for everyone, like ketchup on mandarin oranges - a culinary treat for a 4 and 3/4 year old.
February 1st, 2007 at 1:01 pm
Patrick,
I’m not sure I want to play with you. I am mad that you started your Fleece Girl serial and never finished it. I looked for a new chapter every day until I realized that you just a tease. Fun, yes but, a tease. Also I think that you are further proof that quantum mechanics works.
February 1st, 2007 at 1:47 pm
herb, pleeze don’t get me started on the whole quantum mechanics allegory, i left all that s*** behind when i quit the phd program at mit to pursue a higher calling.
totally agree that artistes behaving badly can completely taint my earlier appreciation of their work. what i tend to notice however is that most of the high-level folks, in any field, that i encounter tend to be grounded, humble, grateful and not the least bit full of themselves–in other words pretty darn gracious and secure.
i know robin you don’t want to share the d***’s name so could you just tell us the movie?
February 1st, 2007 at 2:13 pm
I know this may sound weird, but I actually don’t like to give any publicity–good or bad–to someone whose work or rude behavior turns me off. Which is why you didn’t hear about some of the movies at Sundance that I didn’t like so much. I gave a few of the really horrendous ones some description, but didn’t give the titles. It’s my silent protest–like turning away from someone who’s just insulted you.
So, sorry, but can’t help you with the name of the director or his movie.
February 1st, 2007 at 3:01 pm
i love (and respect) your values and your restraint.
February 1st, 2007 at 3:12 pm
Herb,
I understand completely. Sometimes the evil misses the cracker.
And I’m gonna blame the agent who requested a partial on a story that I haven’t started yet. No, she’s not evil, it’s just that I have redirected all my Fleece Girl serial mojo there.
Plus, I tried serializing the ‘Annette saves hubby from locked bathroom’ story and I don’t know that it was going over well. You know, this kind of is Robin’s blog, no matter how much I believe to the contrary.
I considered turning my blog into a serial warehouse. Haven’t got there yet. Not sure if the demand is high enough.
Peace and Evil,
P
February 1st, 2007 at 3:25 pm
It’s easier to forgive the dead their sins than the living,I’ve found. For example,one of my favorite writers Charles Dickens was a complete womanizer,even lusting after one of his sisters-in-law and mourning her death on a yearly basis. Yet,I can still enjoy his books and appreciate them more,knowing his all too human flaws that made him just as mortal as the rest of us.
Folks like Woody Allen and Tom Cruise have successfully alienated me in their lifetime(along with Michael Richards,Mel Gibson and Rosie O’Donnell). Hard to say if I will ever be able to watch any of their work without some guilt in the future. Writers,well…I had an author at my former bookstore once who was so obnoxious that I fully intend to never read her books ever. She was so overbearing and insisted on reading aloud from her novel(it was just supposed to be an instore signing). She projected her voice like she was performing Shakespeare at Lincoln Center and I couldn’t hear what customers were saying to me at the register. Worst of all,her mom asked us to keep it down!
True story,I swear!
February 1st, 2007 at 3:50 pm
I do agree. I do!
It’s also why I’m afraid to meet some of my fav authors that I know next to nothing about as people. If they are d–ks, I’ll stop purchasing their work.
February 1st, 2007 at 5:24 pm
Lady T, I love Dickens deeply, so I guess I’m just going to have to follow Heather’s method of not asking too many questions.
February 1st, 2007 at 6:07 pm
“don’t ask don’t tell” should be the blog’s motto. ooops, just a suggestion–thank you patrick for the reminder about this being robin’s blog (or at least we let her think that so she’ll keep up the maintenance). can’t believe someone didn’t snap up the “hubby in the bathroom” story–you should definitely get a new agent.
February 1st, 2007 at 8:15 pm
If someone’s a d–k in real life, I totally won’t see their movies/buy their albums/etc.
Examples:
Chris Noth growled at my when I was living in NYC.
Ben Stiller ran flush into me and didn’t apologize, but I never liked him much anyway.
Any musicians who were vocal and active in their opposition of Napster will never get a cent from me again.
More than Mel Gibson being a d–k, he’s an über pretentious director who is obviously pleasing himself with ever movie he makes, if you know what I mean.
and Russell Crowe needs to stop throwing things and cursing out everyone in earshot. If he had paused his career in 1999 when he made his last good movie, that’d be helpful too.
February 1st, 2007 at 8:36 pm
Oww!
February 2nd, 2007 at 5:09 pm
In Chris Noth’s defense, he is a lycanthrope.
And that pretty much sums up my feelings for Ben Stiller.